Just a quick reminder that we are trying new things here at Recipes for Resistance. This Friday we’re going to have a virtual hang at 5pmPDT/8pmEDT. Because of security concerns, it’s only for paid subscribers. So if you already are one: Thank you! Please put us on your calendar and look for our email Friday am. And if you haven’t signed up yet, please consider doing so! Cheers!
It’s been an aggravating week, largely due to the many web-based miracle apps I was wrestling with, all in order to create this Get Out the Vote video: The Pizza Party.
As each edit seemed to throw something else into chaos and I cursed the one or two glitches I could not seem to remove – all while telling myself this would be easier if I had a computer that was less than 6 years old – I kept repeating the mantra that this was merely a learning curve and it would get easier from here. Or tried to repeat it, anyway. I also tried to remind myself of all the things I had learned to do in life, some of which I also actually learned to enjoy. Sometimes I reminded myself that I have no choice but to embrace new skills, so I may as well pretend to like it.
These posts are for everyone, so I try to avoid talking about the intricacies of the entertainment industry in granular detail. But it is going through a seismic shift, one that is not uncommon to what we’re seeing in many of our careers. What it all seems to boil down to is that the people with money want to pay you less of it to do more work, and that’s for the people lucky enough to still have a job. We’re all trying to figure out how to stay relevant in a world that doesn’t want to pay us, but still expects us to buy what they’re selling. It’s a riddle.
The mood in LA right now is that of a country where the regime has just fallen and everyone is at the embassy trying to get the last chopper out. Only no one knows which chopper to take, even as they tell you which one is the right one to get on. In an already fraught situation, everyone’s hot takes – my own included – can be more than a little annoying.
So yeah, it’s easy to be aggravated these days. It’s spreading like whatever strain of COVID we’re on.
Of course, in the background of all of this is the ever-increasing attacks on women’s rights. Or - I should clarify - the ever-increasing loss of women’s rights. We’ve always had the attacks; now they’re succeeding and at a breakneck pace. This week’s news out of Arizona was just one more outrage to bear and I have to keep reminding myself that maybe, in addition to my tech problems, these developments would also make me feel disheartened and discouraged. Angry. Sad. Hopeless. All of the emotions I’m blaming on my computer, but that all have their root in so many other causes.
To have to remind oneself of every awful thing that’s happening is a strange kind of numb, and that’s the point. When you can’t pay attention to everything, they can get away with anything. We can’t keep track of the legal cases, the horrific laws going into effect. I recently looked at a map of all the states where abortion is illegal and thought, “That can’t be right.” It is.
I don’t usually share graphics, but I want us all to understand how bad things have gotten since we lost Roe.
And make no mistake, women’s rights are just one of the many things they are coming for. None of us are safe outside of their White Male Christian dogma. Project 2025 has made that crystal clear. If you cared about even one of these issues, the choice this November should be easy.
And yet, seeds of doubt are already being sewn by these “Vote my Conscience” dickweeds, whose conscience never seems to tell them to do the least harm to the most vulnerable. Once again, we’re hearing that both sides are just as bad, or that disagreeing with President Biden on some things is reason enough to not vote for him - or to even vote at all. People are already excusing those who want to leave the choice for President blank, as if that in and of itself wasn’t a vote for Trump.
It's these people who fill me with a rage the GOP can’t even begin to arouse.
Let someone else coddle their breathtaking stupidity. Let someone else try to reach through to their selfishness, although I don’t know if that’s possible. What these people are in effect telling us is that they want the rest of us to be the grown ups who do what needs to be done. They do not want a Trump Presidency; they were the first to complain in 2016. They are the first to demand everything on their wish list without ever thinking they have to do anything to get it. And they expect us to have the maturity to vote for the correct choice, while they stand by high on their own supply of moral superiority. They are a Christian girl taking it in the Book of Exodus so they can still call themselves a virgin. And if it fails in November, they will blame everyone but themselves. “They didn’t do enough to earn my vote,” they’ll cry, without ever having to ask themselves why Trans kids, and poor women, and immigrants and the rest of those left vulnerable weren’t enough to earn their compassion.
I can’t believe I have to watch this car crash happen again.
And most cannot be reasoned with. They will get off on your reasoning with them; they will get off on your begging them; they will get off on your hating them. Because surely they must be narcissists at heart. Anyone who thinks their need to send a message or have a temper tantrum is more important than all of what we’re going to lose, more deserving than staunching the hemorrhage that four years of this monster has left us still contending with, must be suffering from an affliction found in the DSM-V, because nothing else would make sense.
I am angry today. I hate them with a passion that could power cities.
It’s discouraging to see people espousing this on social media, and to watch as the press gives them an even bigger platform. And we’re already in a discouraging time. Much like my week, we all have the glitches in our life that we can’t seem to fix in addition to bigger worries about the future - for both our country and our jobs. But we’re not alone in that. And that’s the great news. Because we can fill each other up. To that end, I’m really excited about next week’s first live via Zoom Martini Shot Friday. I want us all to come together to celebrate what is working in our lives, and ease the frustration of the glitches for each other.
As for the other killjoys, let’s try to not cause ourselves further distress. Let’s focus on what we can control, on who we can reach. Like everything else we have to accept and live with these days, we have no choice but to win without them. But we can do it.
Next week begins our first live Martini Shot Friday, but it’s only for Paid Subscribers. If you’re interested in joining us, please consider becoming a paid subscriber!
For the last 9 months or so, I’ve been posting Martini Shot Friday videos over on TikTok. It began as a weekly progress report on the writing of Dying to Go. But over time it has evolved into something broader; a way to process how the week had gone before I settled into my weekend with a martini and a crossword puzzle. It’s become a much anticipated ritual: I put on my pajamas, a ridiculous amount of accessories, and allow myself to feel a sense of accomplishment that I got through another week. Sometimes my cats make cameos. And sometimes I try to save Democracy.
I love to think of ways to build community and so lately I’ve been wondering, “What if we all did this together?” What if we met once or twice a month on a live Zoom and had Martini Shot Friday with each other? Put on our sweats with our beverage of choice and recognize the tough things we dealt with that week, the wins, and the questions it left us with. We could talk about big issues and smalls ways to make a difference.
Well, we don’t know until we try. So let’s give it a go and see what happens. The First Martini Shot Friday will be on Friday April 19 at 5pmET/8pmPT. It may also be the final. Or the first of many. Let me know what you think in the comments.
At this time, I’m only offering this to Paid Subscribers. Because of safety issues, it’s the only way I feel comfortable sending a Zoom link to people and inviting them to participate. I hope you’ll understand, and that this might be incentive for you to become one. And no worries if not.
